Are you happy or are you just here?

I’m Baaaaccckkkk!!! Hey y’all and happy Wednesday!! I missed you guys on last week, but I had to take a little time to get my mind together. You all deserve the best of me so I had to get myself together to get back to it. Now let’s talk about happiness.

Happiness…what makes you happy?? Are you doing what makes you happy?? Are you making yourself happy?? Often times in our lives, the answer to these questions may seem like YES when it’s really NO. YES we are making others happy, but NO we aren’t making ourselves happy. YES we are doing good or even great thing but NO we aren’t happy doing them. And I think we are all guilty of letting others dictate our happiness at some point in our lives, whether it be family, friends, significant others or in some cases all 3. But what about YOU?? If you aren’t making yourself happy then how can anyone or anything else??

It has taken me 29 years to get to a truly happy place in my life. Graduating from college didn’t make me happy, getting my job didn’t make me happy and having someone special in my life didn’t make me happy either. Finally being at peace with myself has bought me happiness beyond measure, For most of my life, I have put other people and their feelings and happiness above my own. No one could be sad or disappointed on my watch. I had to make everyone’s day better and brighter. But me and my day….we were dark and gloomy. I was never satisfied, I was always searching for something. I never realized until 1 day my friend and also my therapist asked me, what makes Tiara happy?? Not what Tiara like to do, not my hobbies, not what I do for others…but what actually makes me happy??  And the more I thought about it, the more I couldn’t answer that question.

Happiness comes from within. Happiness comes from finding peace within your heart and your soul. Happiness is even when the world around you is falling apart, you still find yourself feeling an unexplainable peace. Sometimes it takes years to find that within ourselves. For me, I wasted years searching for happiness in people. I searched for MY very own happiness in boyfriends, family, friends and any other people in my life. Because I was unhappy with myself for different reasons, I found myself feeding off of others. I celebrated their wins while wishing they were my own, not realizing that I too was winning and just couldn’t see it.

It ultimately came down to craving peace in my life. While seeking that peace, I sought out my happiness as well. YES it meant that I had to step away from some friendships and relationships because I needed inner peace to be truly happy. I had to spend some deep time with myself, meditating and soul searching…finally getting to know myself. But baby when I did find it, I felt better than I had in years.

If you truly want to be happy, do what is necessary for you. Set goals for yourself and achieve them. Remove negative people from your life and remove yourself from negative situations. Allow yourself to be happy. Stop putting others 1st in your life, be all about you and make sure you are OK 1st (talking to myself too). Live your life for you and without any regrets. Life is extremely short and it is full of ups and downs. Take every chance that you get to do something that makes you feel good. Find what makes you happy in life, hold on to it and never let go, only add to it. Remember, only you can make yourself truly happy before anyone else ever can.

Well that’s it for this week. As usual please like, comment and share with others. Remember to inspire, enlighten  and encourage someone along your journey. Someone out here loves you and so do I. Lots of cyber hugs and kisses. Until next week….

Tiara B.